Thought about giving up

So, I don't know if you've noticed, but I haven't written in some time. I thought about giving up on this blog, because I certainly wasn't using it. I had been keeping up with exercising a few times a week most weeks, sometimes no days on other weeks, but I wasn't telling you about it. I don't really know why. I was feeling a bit like a chicken with it's head cut off, running around all over the place, feeling no sense of accomplishment for a month or so.

Then I started feeling super fat, chubby, puffy, whatever you want to call it, and I didn't like that. I started thinking "what the hell are you doing to yourself Kellie? You look nothing like the person you feel like you are on the inside. It's really not that hard to get off your butt, not be influenced by the world around you, and just exercise already!" I lost 2 grandparents to congestive heart failure, 1 grandparent full of stints and a replaced valve, I have diabetes coming at me from both of my parent's families, I'm kinda scared of anesthesia and not being able to come out of it. (because lets face it, the heart stuff almost always leads to surgery) I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm scared of having heart and blood sugar issues, and I'm scared of being taken down by those things as I get older. I want to be strong. I want to be healthy. I want to feel good and be a good example for my kids, and the thought of looking cute in ALL of my clothes is a nice bonus.

So here I am, back to posting... back to regular workouts not a couple times but FIVE times a week. I set myself a goal this week of doing some kind of exercise every day, and taking the weekend off unless I get the urge to do something light like yoga or walking. I DID IT!! I kept my promise to myself, and I feel great! I'm even taking my vitamins! AND, I'm keeping a spreadsheet record of what I do on what day and of how hard or easy it was, so I can track my progress.

Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I did a tough workout... 3 different workouts to keep it interesting.
Tuesday and Thursday I did yoga workouts to keep it all balanced out. I thought it would help to keep me from feeling sore from the tough ones, and I was right. It all adds up to almost 3 hours this week, 30 to 40 minutes a day.

I'm not doing it to lose weight, I'm not doing it to fit into old clothes... I'm FINALLY being honest with myself and doing it for me, so I can feel good and feel healthy, and it turns out that that's the only real motivation I needed. The weight and the clothes are just a nice added bonus.