A rare glimpse into myself...

This is me trying to break free of me. 

I have a weakness of perspective. I rarely look at things from outside of myself. This could be very dangerous, actually it has been.. kind of a lot in the past. I also have a lack of time frame. Things and days seem to pass by me as I remain still in my life. The world is circling around outside of me and I remain the same. I want to step out of the stillness and into the energy of the world around me. I want to actually accomplish things and move forward in life, and not be inside myself, still and unproductive. I cannot remain on the same path I have been on for so long. It is killing me a tiny piece at a time. Music is the only thing that seems to wake my soul up and bring me to life, and when it does... swoosh, I swirl to life with a flurry of light and love and creativity. I become the me I love to be. I become the me I need to be, the me I truly am deep down. Why am I so afraid of the world seeing this passionate person inside of me. I've been locked away inside myself my whole life. Children were to be seen, not heard. Sweltered and squashed at every turn. Pushed to conform and fit into the mold of an obedient child. My wild curls are the only clear vision of me. The child screaming to be free. I have to find a way to release me. I want out.

Part of this journey is for me to break out of the patterns that are holding me back. Some of the patterns that I have to break out of to be successful at anything, especially this. This is just one of the stones along the path of my journey. I wrote it this morning... it just came flowing out of me.